A club team is a partnership among players, coaches and parents. For a successful season, each group needs to do their jobs well. While there are many books and videos about the art of coaching, less is written about the art of being a successful club volleyball parent. This Handbook distills some lessons learned nationally and in CHAVC to help you achieve peak performance in your role. More resources for parents can be found at http://www.teamusa.org/USA-Volleyball/Grassroots/Parents

In many ways, parents are the unsung heroes of club volleyball. You provide the logistical, emotional, and financial support that makes it all possible. Each CHAVC team needs the following support from team parents. In every area, you will be showing respect for the team and coaches, and modeling good habits for your student athlete:

• ATTENDANCE and TRANSPORTATION – help your student athlete attend all possible practices and matches. Arrange for her to arrive 10 minutes before the scheduled practice time so she will be ready to play on time, and pick her up within 10 minutes after practice. If you daughter is unable to attend a practice or match, give the coach as much advance notice as possible (normally days, not hours).
  NOTE: For safety reasons, never take your child from a practice or match without making certain that the coach knows about it and sees you walk away with her.

• ENCOURAGE HARD WORK – encourage your daughter to work hard at practices and to take the team’s time seriously. Every minute of practice time is precious!

• BE PART OF A POSITIVE TEAM CULTURE - For the players, this means encouraging their teammates and speaking positively about them and their coaches on the court, in school, at home, and in social media. For parents, it means supporting the players, coaches, and other parents during conversations in the car and at home. Help your daughter avoid getting caught up in a spiral of negative thinking and talking about the team.

• PROMOTE COMMUNICATION – establish early, positive contact with the coaches. Encourage your athlete to talk with the coach about her performance and to ask questions. Ask for mid-season parent/coach meetings. If there is an issue or concern, Club policy is that the first step (almost always) is for the player to talk with her coaches. The coaches will try to resolve the situation or will explain what needs to happen and why. The next step, if needed, is for player and parent to meet with the coaches. If that doesn’t provide a satisfactory resolution, contact CHAVC’s Director (director@chavc.net). Of course if there is ever a safety or health concern, contact the coaches right away.

• SUPPORT POSITIVE COACHING. Positive coaches work hard to win matches, but have another, even more important goal: to use the sports experience to help athletes learn life lessons and develop character traits that will help them be successful throughout their lives. Positive coaches oppose a win-at-all-cost mentality.
  Parents can support positive coaching by helping promote three principles which have the power to transform youth sports:

   

  1. Redefine “winner” − Winners are athletes who give maximum effort, continue to learn and improve, and refuse to let mistakes - or fear of making mistakes - stop them. Parents can build this attitude by:

  • Telling your athlete that it’s OK to make mistakes.
  • Letting her know you appreciate it when she tries hard even when unsuccessful
  • Asking rather than telling. Give her openings to talk about her play rather than telling her what you think about it. Ask open-ended questions (e.g., “What was the best part of the game for you?”)
  • Encouraging her to have a brief ritual for learning from mistakes then flushing them away.
  • Recognizing that mastering volleyball is hard work and is technical. Let the coaches criticize your child’s play.

  2. Fill the emotional tank − Athletes have emotional tanks that need to be filled. Research shows that athletes do their best when they receive a Magic Ratio of 5:1 praise to criticism. Help achieve this Magic Ratio by:

  • Encouraging her regardless of what happens in the game.
  • Trying not to give a lot of advice. After a tough game, advice can seem like criticism, which drains a person’s emotional tank. Offer encouragement for the next match. After tough losses, it can help to acknowledge her feelings of disappointment.
  • Using the “3-Pluses-and-a-Wish” technique. Before giving advice, find three good things about your athlete’s performance. Phrase the advice as a wish. If you can’t come up with three positives, don’t say the wish!

  3. Honor the game - Let your athlete know that you want her to honor the game by respecting the ROOTS of positive play:

  • Rules− We don’t bend the rules to win.
  • Opponents− A worthy opponent is a gift that forces us to play to our highest potential.
  • Officials− We treat officials with respect even when we disagree.
  • Teammates− We never do anything that would embarrass our team on or off the field.
  • Self − We live up to our own standards regardless of what others do.
    Discuss the meaning of each element of ROOTS, especially with younger athletes.
    Be a good role model for honoring the game. When you attend matches, cheer both teams when exceptional plays are made. If an official makes a mistake, be silent! Use this as an opportunity to think about how difficult it is to officiate a game perfectly.
    Encourage other parents and your guests to honor the game.